Bit bored tonight with sod all on TV except a crud vampire movie and it was while watching it that the thought struck me.Where exactly do vampires buy their clothes and furniture from?
They cant nip out to the GAP during lunchtime, they cant buy mail order as they'd always be asleep when the postie comes and even IKEA shuts at 8pm.
So all that's left is ASDA and TESCO open when they're up and about but I've never seen a vampire that looks like a model for ASDA George living in a semi detached house furnished with nothing but reclaimed shopping trolleys.
Now one might say "hey Alan, vampires aren't real" and that would be a very strong argument but none the less I think the movie studios have been able to get away with the whole vampire/domestic arrangement oversight for far too long.
They might even discover a whole niche market in horror/obsessive-compulsive disorder crossover movies.
And another thing, if vampires don't cast a reflection how do they shave without cutting themselves or manage to put their mascara on?
2 comments:
vampires are dead and dont need to shave, hair does not grow on dead bodies. They are wearing the clothes they died in, or were buried in and they probably find their furniture outside in the trash on the side of the road considering how dingey it always looks, and it is in great commodities everywhere outside... just an opinion.
So....If they wear the clothes the died in why do they never seem to die in their pyjamas or underwear.
I've yet to see an onscreen vampire lurking about in their fluffy bunny slippers and cosy P.J.'s?
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