Bit bored tonight with sod all on TV except a crud vampire movie and it was while watching it that the thought struck me.Where exactly do vampires buy their clothes and furniture from?
They cant nip out to the GAP during lunchtime, they cant buy mail order as they'd always be asleep when the postie comes and even IKEA shuts at 8pm.
So all that's left is ASDA and TESCO open when they're up and about but I've never seen a vampire that looks like a model for ASDA George living in a semi detached house furnished with nothing but reclaimed shopping trolleys.
Now one might say "hey Alan, vampires aren't real" and that would be a very strong argument but none the less I think the movie studios have been able to get away with the whole vampire/domestic arrangement oversight for far too long.
They might even discover a whole niche market in horror/obsessive-compulsive disorder crossover movies.
And another thing, if vampires don't cast a reflection how do they shave without cutting themselves or manage to put their mascara on?
